All About Britney Spears

How do you like Chinese pop songs? I'm a Chinses student, ask you several questions. How do you like Chinese pop songs? Have you ever heard of Jay Chou or Jolin or some Chinese pop stars? How do you like their music? Do you have any suggestion for me about American pop stars? I'm really interestde in it.

Who else likes these cool J-pop artists? The first j-pop group I ever really got into was the Pizzicato Five in the mid '90's, I even saw them perform live once in Los Angeles. But I did not really turn on to J-pop until a few years ago while living in China and seeing Japanese R&B/Dance divas like Utada Hikaru and Namie Amuro on the music video shows. I actually listen mostly to Chinese pop, but in the past couple of years I've continued to delve into J-pop and artists like these: m-flo Chemistry Heartsdales Mink Dragon Ash Ken Hirai (his recent video for POP STAR is hysterical) Monkey Majik (lead singer is American) Who are your favorites? If you've never heard of these artists I urge you to check them out, and www.YourTube.com is a great place to start. Well, the Anime soundtrack groups in Japan are not exactly from the top tier of Japanese pop. Japan is second only to the U.S. music market in terms of sales, and the artists that I have mentioned are popular all over Asia, but virtually unknown in the U.S. Think about it, how many U.S. pop artists allow their music to be used in Saturday morning cartoons? Spidey, you're really funny, but your answer is off the topic. My question is for those, like me, who are into J-pop. I would like to know what bands/artists they appreciate.

Who will perform at the Beijing Olympics opening ceremony??? Who will perform?? Chinese pop stars? What about the 12 girls band or ayumi hamasaki (She's japanese but...) :)

What is the fastest way to become a star??? i wanne become a star... i speak chinese english malay(abit)and thai(abit)... i dance popping* krumping locking hip-hop and now learning b.boys... i sing and i have a very good friend who sing also...we are double(2 person) in this group... hope to hear reply soon...

do you think she is pretty? she is a chinese pop star http://et.21cn.com/topic/star/zhengxinyi...

How many people would move to Japan if Japan guarantee free sex with japanese girls for a week? hahah..im sorry. My friend and i always talk about that if JAPAN were to tell all the people in China that if they move to Japan that instant, they can kiss a Japanese famous pop star, all of the sudden, 4/5 of the chinese people would move right away. haha I wonder if it will be the same case in America. The way i really see it, people are not really that patriotic at all.. it's all just words really. they don't mean anything.

are they pretty? (some photos)? i am asian.. i am doing a study on " what is the standard towards pretty of asian girls and boys in western people's eyes " here is some photos of different chinese and japanese pop star. please point out which one is pretty, average/common, and ugly. just trust your personal judgment. 1. http://img150.imageshack.us/img150/6830/41qb3.jpg 2. http://img226.imageshack.us/img226/1259/a300004sl5.jpg 3. http://img89.imageshack.us/img89/8484/10epz4.jpg 4. http://img144.imageshack.us/img144/3717/31735326ts9.jpg 5. http://img226.imageshack.us/img226/847/w020041231378824845734gw6.jpg

I should probably be asking this on the movies or acting board, but is it common among chinese MA movie actors .... to double as pop stars? or is this just jackie chan following in the footsteps of leonard nimoy and he is just making a fool of himself? http://movies.yahoo.com/mv/news/ap/20071024/119326728000.html I stand corrected. jackie chan seems to be the way american actors should be like mickey rooney or or liz taylor or actors from decades ago who were multi talented. today it seems like they aren't even talented at what they "specialize" in.

lyrics for english and chinese songs here? meant to be by shiny jupiter rising electro pop and search yahoo for these chinese songs Chinese New Year song by Jimmy Lin undamp Kenny Bee Chinese New Year 1990 with HK stars Bobby Au Yeung undamp Nancy Sit Chinese New Year Song thx

First Joke,,,,,,hahaha or boo!!!??? star for hahaha pls & Merry Christmas everyone!!!? Way back in the time of the samurai, there was a powerful emperor. This emperor needed a new head samurai. So, he sent out a message to everybody he knew for them to send a message to who they knew, and so forth. A year passes, and only three people show up: a Japanese samurai, a Chinese samurai, and a Jewish samurai. The emperor asks the Japanese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head samurai. The Japanese samurai opens up a matchbox, and out pops a little fly. WHOOOOOSH. The fly drops dead on the ground in 2 pieces! The emperor says, "That is very impressive!" Then the emperor asks the Chinese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head samurai. The Chinese samurai opens up a matchbox and out pops a little fly. WHOOOOOOSH. WOOOOOOOSH. The fly drops dead on the ground in 4 pieces! The emperor says, "That is really impressive!" Then the emperor asks the Jewish samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be head samurai. The Jewish samurai thinks, "If it works for the other two..." So the Jewish samurai walks in, opens a matchbox,and out pops a little fly. WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSHHHH! A gust of wind fills the room, but the fly is still buzzing around. The emperor says in disappointment, "Why is the fly not dead?" And the Jewish samurai replies - "Look closer, that fly has been circumcised!"

funny joke? ive got a joke i heard the other day. give it a star if you like it. there was this guy who wanted to go on an expedition, so he hired a german, an italian, and a chinese guy. The german was in charge of transportation, the italian was in charge of food, and the chinese guy was in charge of supplies. The german brought four trucks, the italian brought a buffet and everybody was fed, but the chinese guy was nowhere to be found. After hours of looking the chinese guy popped out from behind a box and yelled "supplies"

what is western social ?us or europe? i compare west social and east social one time i see paris hilton go to shaighai china in tv i feel maybe she doesnt know the eastern social i live in taipei the western world culture us and uk canada europe are these people think the same? sometimes i look at tv cnn bbs news or us music tv , mtv bet most made in us some made in uk and in western social white and black live together believe jesus speak english i like us pop culture really black rap star l interest soulja boy because i really like hiphop i know that from us in western world is so different with eastern world china young people like japan korea because taiwanese understand chinese so we know and learn a lot of history of china but that is no use for now 21 centry most people who can speak chinese like to move to us to be an american because they think us education is better them here and in race japan korea china taiwan people usually culture the same and is uk more the same us or europe

some more bizarre facts? happy reading lol. *According to sales, 17,000 individual 'smarties' are eaten every minute in the UK *The life of an eyelash is about 5 months. *Iceland, Europe's second largest island following Great Britain, boasts of having the world's oldest 'active' parliamentary body, Althing, which first met in 930AD. *The Turkish football club, Galatasaray, has an A for every other letter. *The tongue of a mature Blue Whale has approximately the same mass as that of an entire adult elephant. *The study, which tested telephones, desks, water coolers, doorknobs, and toilet seats, compiled 7,000 samples from major centers across the country. What they found, was that while phones ranked highest in bacteria levels, the office desk was a close second. *In England during World War I, many German names and titles were changed and given more English-sounding names, including the royal family's from Saxe-Coburg-Gotha to Windsor. Kaiser Wilhelm II countered this by jokingly saying that he was off to see a performance of 'The Merry Wives of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha.' *Both turdoid and turdine mean "belonging to the family turdus," Turdus musicus is the song thrush & Turdus viscivorus is the mistletoe thrush *Nearly a quarter of all mammals can fly; with a huge 985 known species, bats make up 23.1% of all known mammals by species *January is National Soup Month in the United States, January is the seasonal equivalent to July in the Southern Hemisphere; & on Jan 14th, 90% of New Year resolutions will be broken! *You use an average of 43 muscles for a frown and you use an average of 17 muscles for a smile, and they say every two thousand frowns creates one wrinkle *Baby robins eat 14 feet of earthworms in the first 14 nestling days of their life and that is not even their main food on the menu (14 feet a day is wrong) But parent robins make around 100 food visits to the nest every day! *The first man to die during planning & construction of the Hoover Dam was the father of the last man to die during its construction. December 20, 1922 with J.G. Tierney a Bureau of Reclamation employee who was part of a geological survey and drowned when he fell from a barge. Exactly 13 years later, in 1935, his son Patrick W. Tierney, fell to his death from an intake tower. * You will have to walk 80 kilometers for your legs to equal the amount of exercise your eyes get daily *The Chinese used fingerprints as a method of identification back in 700 *Sound travels 15 times faster through steel than it does through the air *A greenfly born on a Tuesday can be a grandparent by Friday *There are more mobile phones in UK than there are people *Termites are affected by music; the termites will eat your house twice as fast if you play them loud music *Paraskavedekatriaphobia is the extreme fear of Friday the 13th *One gallon of used motor oil can ruin approximately one million gallons of fresh water! *Christopher Trace, the first presenter of Blue Peter, was the body double for Charlton Heston in the film Ben-Hur *Thomas Edison got patents for a method of making concrete furniture and a cigar which was supposed to burn forever *A cubic mile of ordinary fog contains less than a gallon of water *If you think of the Milky Way as being the size of the continent of Asia, our solar system would be the size of a penny. *The chicken is the closest living relative to the Tyrannosaurus Rex Myth or fact?? *The average driver will be locked out of their car nine times during their life time (yes, men are in the stats) *A Boeing 767 airliner contains 3,100,000 parts * Belief in the existence of vacuums used to be punishable under Church law * Your skin weighs twice as much as your brain *An owl can see a mouse moving from over 150ft away by a light no brighter than candlelight *The average person has walked 100,000 miles by the time they reach the age of 85. *Your hearing is less sharp after eating too much *In the course of a lifetime, the average person spends 2 years on the phone (I bet cell phones/mobiles were not taken into consideration when that fact was worked out!!) * Henry VIII was once served a loin of beef while visiting the house of a noble. He was so impressed with the beef that he asked for a sword and knighted it! Ever since, that particular cut of beef has been known as sirloin. ("Sir Loin").. This is a MYTH *In a lifetime, the average clean-shaven man will spend five months shaving and will remove 28ft of hair. *Beethoven was extremely particular about his coffee , he always counted 60 beans per cup. *In 1943, Navy officer Grace Hopper had to fix a computer glitch caused by a moth, hence the term 'computer bug'. *Jupiter is large enough to contain the other major 7 planets in our solar system. *The water pressure inside every onion cell would be sufficient to explode a steam engine. *Sunglasses were first worn by film stars, not to look mysterious, but to relieve there eyes from the dazzling glare of the early studio lights *If you take any number, double it, add 10, divide by 2, and subtract your original number, the answer will always be 5. *Over a 12 day period your body generates a whole new set of taste buds. (This process continues until you are in your 70's.) *Greyhounds can reach their top speed of 45 mph in just 3 strides *There is more sugar in 1kg of lemons than in 1kg of strawberries. *Paraskevidekatriaphobia, is a morbid, irrational fear of Friday the 13th. Therapist Dr. Donald Dossey, whose specialty is treating people with irrational fears, coined the term. He claims, when you can pronounce the word you are cured. Friggatriskaidekaphobia has the same meaning. *American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first class *Titan arum is probably the world's smelliest flower. Originating in the tropical rain forests of Sumatra, this huge, extremely rare flower is a giant lily. It seldom blooms, but when it does the smell is described as something like the dead carcass of an animal *A Viking tribe once raided England because they had run out of beer *Walt Disney World generates about 120,000 pounds of garbage every day. *Turtles can breath through their bottoms. *Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts. *The buzz generated by an electric razor in America is in the key of B flat. In the UK, it is in the key of G. *Some of the most popular lipstick shades in Renaissance England were named, Rat, Horseflesh, Turkey, Blood and Puke. *When Thomas Eddison died in 1941, Henry Ford captured his dying breath in a bottle. *Alfred Hitchcock's "Psycho" was the first Hollywood film that showed a toilet flushing - thereby generating many complaints. *The first flying-trapeze circus act was performed by Frenchman Jules Leotard at the Circus Napoleon on Nov 12th 1859. He invented the garment now known as the leotard. *In 1972 when Gordon Brown (British Chancellor of the Excheque) was 21, he won a Daily Express competition for "A Vision of Britain In The Year 2000." *It is said, grapefruit scent makes middle age women seem six years younger to men (but it does not work the other way round). *The average elephant produces 50lb of dung a day. *The dinosaur noises in Jurassic Park came from slowing down the sounds of elephants, geese and horses. *The French invented the pop of the Christmas Cracker in the 19th century (Tom Smith bought the idea back to UK after holidaying in France) *The chances of hitting 2 holes-in-one during the same round of golf is one in 8 million *Victorian ladies tried to enlarge their boobs by bathing in strawberries *Until the 18th century, India produced almost all the world's diamonds *The ancient Egyptians thought it was good luck to enter a house left foot first *During their marriage, Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton bought an electric chair for their dining room * The average single man is one inch shorter than the average married man *Lightning strikes about 6,000 times per minute on this planet of which 80% are in-cloud flashes and 20% are cloud-to-ground flashes. *When screen lover Rudolph Valentino married Jean Acker (on Bonfire Day), she locked him out of their bedroom, the marriage lasted only six hours *160 cars can drive side by side on the Monumental Axis in Brazil, the world's widest road. On paper they can, as the road (actually it's an avenue) is 865 feet wide, but in reality they can't. *When a female horse and a male donkey mate, the off-spring is called a mule; but when a male horse and a female donkey mate, the off spring is called a HINNY *On average women speak 7000 words per day, where as men speak just over 2000 *Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair *While in Alcatraz, Al Capone was inmate No.85 *Disney World is bigger than the world's 5 smallest countries *A house fly hums in the middle octave key of F *Adolf Hitler's mother seriously considered having an abortion but was talked out of it by her doctor *In one gram of soil, about ten million bacteria live in it *A single ounce of gold can be beaten into a thin film covering 100 square feet *Before the 1800, there were no separately designed shoes for left and right feet *Paper was invented early in the second century by Chinese eunuch *The first person to receive a singing telegram was singer Rudy Vallee, in honour of his 32nd birthday, July 28th 1933. * The longest one-syllable word in the English language is screeched *In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes when you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase, "Goodnight, sleep tight." *There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball *A 75-year-old male driver received ten traffic tickets, drove on the wrong side of the road four times, committed four hit-and-run offenses and caused six accidents, all within 20 minutes, in McKinney, TX on 15 Oct 1966 [Worst driver: G. B. of Records] *The term "the whole 9 yards" came from WWII fighter pilots in the South Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet, before being loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got "the whole 9 yards." *Wilma Flintstone's maiden name was Shaghoopal *The word "trivia" comes from the Latin "trivium" which is the place where three roads meet. People would gather and talk about all sorts of matters. Also in medieval universities, the trivium comprised the three subjects taught first, grammar, logic, and rhetoric, AND the Roman Goddess, Trivia, is the goddess of crossroads, witchcraft and the harvest moon. *In 1935, the police in Atlantic City, New Jersey, arrested 42 men on the beach. They were cracking down on topless bathing suits worn by men. *During lunch breaks in Carlsbad, New Mexico no couple should engage in a sexual act while parked in their vehicle, unless their car has curtains. *The distance between cities are actually the distances between city halls. When you see a sign "Sheffield - 40 miles" it means it is 40 miles to the city hall of that city sign *The name of Canada is believed to come from the Iroquois Indian word "Kanata", meaning "village" or "community". The word Canada was first used in a 1534 text written by Jacques Cartier describing the Indian village of Stadacona. *The longest non-medical word in the English language is floccipausinihilipilification (29 letters), which means "the act of estimating as worthless." *Dominica, Mexico, Zambia, Kiribati, Fiji and Egypt all have birds on their flags. *Bees visit over 2,000 flowers and fly over 55,000 miles to produce just 1lb. of honey *Four out of every ten people who come to a party in your home will look in your bathroom cabinet *The taboo against whistling backstage comes from the pre-electricity era when a whistle was the signal for the curtains and the scenery to drop. An unexpected whistle could cause an unexpected scene change! *The sound you hear when macho people crack their knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting. *Francis Bacon died of hypothermia while trying to freeze a chicken by stuffing it with snow *Captain Jean-Luc Picard's (Star Trek) fish was named Livingston *The WD in WD40 means "water displacement." The 40 in WD40 comes from the 40 attempts at creating this product. *Beethoven dipped his head in cold water before he composed. *Mice, whales, elephants, giraffes and man all have seven neck vertebra. * The name for Oz in the "Wizard of Oz" was thought up when the creator, Frank Baum, looked at his filing cabinet and saw A-N, and O-Z, hence "Oz." *American car horns beep in the tone of F. *The only food cockroaches won't eat are cucumbers. *China has more English speakers than the U.S. *Hong Kong has the world's largest double-decker tram fleet in the world *The words silent and listen have the same letters. Santa and Satan do too *You can tell the sex of a turtle by the sound it makes, A male grunts, A female hisses. *There are no public toilets in Peru. *Samuel Clemens [aka Mark Twain] was born in 1835 when Haley's Comet came into view. When he died in 1910, Haley's Comet came into view again *The pound sign is called a 'octothorp.' *In 1963, baseball pitcher Gaylord Perry remarked, "They'll put a man on the moon before I hit a home run." On July 20, 1969, a few hours after Neil Armstrong set foot on the moon, Gaylord Perry hit his first, and only, home run *"Dreamt" is the only word in the English language to end in "mt." *The Queen termite can live up to 50 years and have 30,000 children every day *The term, "It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye" is from Ancient Rome. The only rule during wrestling matches was, "No eye gouging," eveything else was allowed. *A Dalmatian is the only dog that can get gout *The male gypsy moth can smell the virgin female up to 1.8 miles away *A male emperor moth can smell a female emperor moth up to 7 miles away *The human heart creates enough pressure to squirt blood 30 feet out of the body. *A puff of smoke, such as when someone is smoking a cigarette or a pipe is called " a lunt " *The name "Pinocchio" is from Tuscany, Italy and means "pine nut" or "kernel". *Gilligan of Gilligan's Island had a first name that was only used once, on the never-aired pilot show. His first name was Willy *It was the left shoe that Aschenputtel (Cinderella) lost at the stairway, when the prince tried to follow her. It was originally the right, but the translator messed up again. *Cinderella's slippers were originally made out of fur. The story was changed in the 1600's by a translator. *Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour & if you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee *For 47 days in 1961, the painting "Matisse's Le Bateau (The Boat)" was hanging upside down in the Museum of Modern Art in New York. None of the over 116,000 visitors seem to have noticed. *Walt Disney named Mickey Mouse after Mickey Rooney, whose mother he dated. *Lorne Greene had one of his nipples bitten off by an alligator while he was host of "Lorne Greene's Animal Kingdom." *The magic word 'Abracadabra' was originally intended for the specific purpose of curing hay fever. *The phrase "rule of thumb" was popularized by an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb top to first joint. (a thumb measurement is an inch) *More redheads are born in Scotland UK than in any other part of the world *The Sanskrit word for 'war' means - "desire for more cows". *The average bed is home to over 5 billion dust mites. *Only female wasps, bees, and mosquitoes sting. *Las Vegas means "The Meadows" in Spanish. *Born on November 2, 1718, British politician, John Montagu, the 4th Earl of Sandwich, is credited with naming the 'sandwich.' He developed a habit of eating beef between slice of toast so he could continue to play cards uninterrupted. *Ice hockey was first played in 1885 by British soldiers stationed in Canada *Armored knights raised their visors to identify themselves when they rode past their king. This custom has become the modern military salute. *Your fingernails grow 4 times faster than your toe nails *Pain travels faster than 3000 feet per second *A cow produces 200 times more gas a day than a person *About 10,000,000 people have the same birthday as you *The snail mates only once in it's entire life, also a snail has 4 noses *The Coca-Cola company is the biggest consumer of sugar in the world *The dot that appears over the letter "i" is called a tittle. *All major league baseball umpires must wear black underwear while on the job (in case their pants split) *Captain Kirk never said "Beam me up, Scotty," but he did say, "Beam me up, Mr. Scott" *The word gymnasium comes from the Greek word gymnazein which means to exercise naked *Everyone thought Albert Einstein suffered from dyslexia, because he couldn't speak properly until he was 9 years old. *Mel Blanc (the voice of Bugs Bunny) was allergic to carrots *The nation of Monaco on the French Riviera, is smaller than Central Park in New York. Monaco is 370 acres and Central Park is 840 acres *Gweneth Paltrow's nickname for Steven Speilberg is "Uncle Morty." Steven Speilberg calls Gweneth Paltrow "Gwynnie the pooh." *You can't kill yourself by holding your breath. *The sorcerer's name in Disney's Fantasia is Yensid, which happens to be Disney backwards. *Armadillos are the only animal besides humans that can get leprosy *The world's longest name is: Adolph Blaine Charles David Earl Frederick Gerald Hubert Irvin John Kenneth Lloyd Martin Nero Oliver Paul Quincy Randolph Shermasn Thomas Uncas Victor William Xerxes Yancy Zeus Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorft Sr. *Shirly Temple received 135,000 presents on her 8th birthday. * When Christopher Columbus and crew landed in the New World they observed the natives using a nose pipe to smoke a strange new herb. The pipe was called a "tabaka" by the locals, hence our word tobacco. *Americans on the average eat 18 acres of pizza every day. *The sound of E.T. walking was made by someone squishing her hands in jelly. *Hitler and Napoleon both had only one testicle. *Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie. *In ancient China, people committed suicide by eating a pound of salt. *Queen Victoria [UK 1837-1901] eased the discomfort of her monthly cramps by having her doctor supply her with marijuana. *The average human eats 8 spiders in their lifetime at night. [usually in our sleep] ~ this is a MYTH *If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough energy is produced to create an atomic bomb *Sugar was first added to chewing gum in 1869 by a dentist (William Semple). One way to assure business!! *The Ramses brand condom is named after the great phaoroh Ramses II who fathered over 160 children. *The names of the three wise monkeys are: Mizaru: See no evil, Mikazaru: Hear no evil, and Mazaru: Speak no evil. *The Spanish word esposa means "wife." The plural, esposas, means "wives," but also "handcuffs." *23% of all photocopier faults worldwide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their butts. * There was one U.S. state that no longer exists? In 1784 the U.S. had a state called Franklin, named after Benjamin Franklin. But four years later, it was incorporated into Tennessee. *The clinical term for a hairy buttocks is "daysypgal." *A duck's quack doesn't echo, and ... no one knows why.~ MYTH everything echoes. University students have recorded a ducks echo. It is usually so quiet we cannot hear it. *"The sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language. ??? Maybe if said fast. *Clans many many years ago that wanted to get rid of their unwanted people without killing them, burnt their houses down - hence the expression " to get fired." !!

Glastonbury Festival 2007 full lineup?

Bored....RANDOM POLL!? Redsox or Yankees Mets or Yankees Rap or Pop Rock or Hip Hop Pool or Jacuzzi Sports or Music Burger King or McDonalds Italian Food Or Chinese Food Wendy's or Nathan's Hannah Montana/Jonas Brothers...Love Em or Hate em? LAST ONE: Pancakes or Waffles? Thanks...star please

Yo mama jokes? your moms like a big mac...full of fat and worth 1 dollar Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, No Professionals." Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning. Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yes, let's go bury it." Yo momma so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars. Yo momma so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween. Yo momma so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her. Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry. Yo momma so ugly she is very successful at her job: Being a scarecrow. Yo momma so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound. Yo momma so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies. Yo momma so ugly they filmed, "Gorillas in the Mist," in her shower. Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras. Yo momma so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her. Yo momma so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say ,"Damn, is it Halloween already?" Yo momma so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday. Yo momma so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects. Yo momma so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints. Yo momma so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours...for a quote! Yo momma so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out! Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested! Yo momma so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her! Yo momma so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone! Yo momma so ugly the psychiatrist makes her lie facedown. Yo momma so ugly she turned Medusa to stone! Yo momma so ugly that when she cries the tears run down the back of her head because they're afraid of her face!! Yo momma so ugly that her face will make a freight train take a dirt road! Yo momma so ugly the NHL banned her for life. Yo momma so ugly, she walked into taco bell and they all ran for the border! Yo momma so ugly people go ask her for Halloween. Yo momma so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her. Yo momma so ugly she scares the roaches away. Yo momma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye. Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party! Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!! " Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!! Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled, "HEY, KOOL-AID!" Yo momma fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck. Yo momma is so fat her waist size is equator! Yo momma so fat she went bungee jumping and went strait to hell! Yo momma so fat shes on both side of the family. Yo momma so fat when she walks around in Texas in high heels, she strikes oil! Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale! Yo momma so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he told her to move her fat ole *** over! Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it. Yo momma so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up. Yo momma so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction! Yo momma so fat she wakes up in sections! Yo momma so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER! Yo momma so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun! Yo momma so fat she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phone book! Yo momma so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand! Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says, "To be continued." Yo momma so fat her nickname is, "DAY-UM!" Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. Yo momma so fat we're in her right now. Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise. Yo momma so fat, she went to the movies and sat next to everyone. Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors. Yo mamma so fat, you have to roll over twice to get off her... Yo momma so fat she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the new world. Yo momma so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling, "Free Willy!" Yo momma so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop! Yo momma so fat when she has sex, she has to give directions! Yo momma so fat, she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says, "Okay!" Yo momma so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people say, "Taxi!" Yo momma so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized. Yo momma so fat, she got to iron her pants on the driveway. Yo momma so fat I've known her all my life ... and I still haven't seen ALL of her! Yo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller. Yo momma so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets. Yo momma so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th. Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too. Yo momma so fat the highway patrol made her wear, "Caution! Wide Turn." Yo momma so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE! Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale, it read, "One at a time, please." Yo momma so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo. Yo momma so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs! Yo momma so fat she's got her own area code! Yo momma so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagen! Yo momma so fat God couldn't light Earth till she moved! Yo momma so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her! Yo momma so fat, whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in! Yo momma so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago... Yo momma so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg. Yo momma so fat , her legs are like spoiled milk - white & chunky! Yo momma so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the *****'s good side! Yo momma so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of George Washington's nose. Yo momma so fat she was mistaken for God's bowling ball! Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps she goes straight to hell! Yo momma so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views! Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon! Yo momma so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in! Yo momma so fat that when she hauls ***, she has to make two trips! Yo momma so fat her belly button's got an echo. Yo momma so fat even her clothes have stretch marks! Yo momma so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper! Yo momma so fat she uses a pillow case as a sock. Yo momma so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out! Yo momma so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights! Yo momma so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out! Yo momma so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans! Yo momma so fat her blood type is ragu. Yo momma so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping Yo momma so fat she has to buy two airline tickets. Yo momma so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas. Yo momma so fat the animals at the zoo feed her. Yo momma so fat when she dances at a concert the whoelband skips! Yo momma so fat she stands in two time zones. Yo momma so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through. Yo momma so fat when the ***** goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps. Yo momma so fat that she can't tie her own shoes. Yo momma so fat sets off car alarms when she runs. Yo momma so fat she can't reach her back pocket. Yo momma so fat when she wears a Malcomn-X T-shirt, helicopters try to land on her back! Yo momma so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth. Yo momma so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures. Yo momma so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard. Yo momma so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles. Yo momma so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon. Yo momma so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl. Yo momma so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it. Yo momma so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?" Yo momma so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow! Yo momma so fat she uses I-95 for a Slip 'n Slide. Yo momma so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks. Yo momma so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts! Yo momma so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet. Yo momma so fat she was Miss Arizona -- class Battleship. Yo momma so fat she accidently got a 757 caught in her teeth. Yo momma so fat to her, "light food," means under 4 Tons! Yo momma so fat she went on a date with high heels on and came back with sandals! Yo momma so fat and stupid, her waist size is larger than her IQ! Yo momma so fat she was zoned for commercial development. Yo momma so fat she won, "Miss Bessie the Cow 94." Yo momma so fat she has her own brand of jeans: FA - FatAss Jeans. Yo momma so stupid, she studied for a drug test! Yo momma so stupid, she thought, "Wu Tang" was an African orange drink! Yo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl. Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved! Yo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order! Yo momma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone! Yo momma so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money! Yo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight! Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund! Yo momma so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. Yo momma so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put, "O.K." Yo momma so stupid she stole free bread. Yo momma so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners. Yo momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch! Yo momma so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home. Yo momma so stupid she took an umbrella to see Purple Rain. Yo momma so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes. Yo momma so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends. Yo momma so stupid she told everyone that she was, "Illegitiment" because she couldn't read. Yo momma so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind. Yo momma so stupid you have to dig for her IQ! Yo momma so stupid she took a cup to see Juice. Yo momma so stupid she asked you, "What is the number for 911?" Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out. Yo momma so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl. Yo momma so stupid she called Dan Quayle for a spell check. Yo momma so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back. Yo momma so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train. Yo momma so stupid when asked on an application, "Sex?" she marked, "M, F and sometimes Wednesday too." Yo momma so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif. Yo momma so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean! Yo momma so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds! Yo momma so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center. Yo momma so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead. Yo momma so stupid she jumped out the window and went up. Yo momma so stupid she thought a quarterback was an income tax refund. Yo momma so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain. Yo momma so stupid that under, "Education," on her job application, she put, "Hooked on Phonics." Yo momma so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house. Yo momma so stupid she watches, "The Three Stooges" and takes notes. Yo momma so stupid was born on Independence Day and can't remember her birthday. Yo momma so stupid she thought gangrene was another golf course. Yo momma so stupid that she went to a Clippers game to get a hair cut. Yo momma so stupid, she couldn't read an audio book. Yo momma so stupid it take her a month to get rid of the 7 day itch. Yo momma so stupid she stands up on an empty bus. Yo momma so stupid it take her a week to get rid of a 24 hourr virus. Yo momma so stupid it take her a day to cook a 3 minute egg. Yo momma so stupid she has to ask for help to use hamburger helper . Yo momma so stupid she went to Disney World and saw a sign that said "Disney World - Left" so she went home. Yo momma so stupid she asked me what kind of jeans I had on and I said, "Guess" so she said, "Levi's." Yo momma so old, she has Jesus' beeper number! Yo momma so old, her social security number is 1! Yo momma so old, she older than yo grandma! Yo momma so old that when God said let the be light, she hit the switch! Yo momma so old that when she was in school, there was no history class. Yo momma so old, she owes Jesus 3 bucks! Yo momma so old she's in Jesus's yearbook! Yo momma so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook. Yo momma so old her birth certificate says expired on it. Yo momma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince. Yo momma so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper. Yo momma so old she ran track with dinosaurs. Yo momma so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals. Yo momma so old when she reads the bible she reminisces. Yo momma so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade. Yo momma so old and stupid she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said, "Li'l Mary will never amount to anything". Yo momma so old she was Jesus Wet Nurse. Yo momma so old shes blind from the big bang. Yo momma so old even God calls her mother! Yo momma so poor, she bounces food stamps!! Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box! Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay attention! Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush! Yo momma so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway. Yo momma so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk. Yo momma so poor burglars break in her house and leave money. Yo Momma so poor she can't afford the o or the r. Yo Momma so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, and she said, "Moving." Yo Momma so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers! Yo Momma so poor when I ring the doorbell she says, "DING!" Yo Momma so poor her face is on the front of a food stamp. Yo Momma is so poor when she heard about the last supper she thought she had ran out of food stamps. Yo Momma so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?" She said, "Buying luggage." Yo Momma so poor she drives a peanut. Yo Momma so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning. Yo Momma so poor she does drive by shootings on the bus. Yo Momma so poor you put RoundUp on the weeds and she said, "There goes breakfast, lunch, and dinner!" Yo Momma so poor you asked her where the facilities were, and she said, "Pick a corner, any corner." Yo Momma so poor I walked into your house and 3 roaches tripped me & tried to take my wallet! Do you know the story about the little old woman that lives in a shoe? Well, Yo mama so poor she live in a flip flop! Yo momma like a shot gun, two cocks and she blows! Yo momma like Domino's pizza -- Something for nothing. Yo momma like spoiled milk, fat and chunky! Yo momma like cake mix, 15 servings per package! Yo momma like a bowling ball: She's picked up, fingered, and thrown in the gutter. Yo momma like a Toyota: "Oh what a feelin'!" Yo momma like Orange Crush: "Good Vibrations!" Yo momma like a hockey team...changes her pads every three periods! Yo momma like chinese food: sweet, sour and cheap! Yo momma is like a racing car...chick burned four rubbers in one night. Yo momma like castlebury stew: servings are family size. Yo mommas teeth are so yellow, traffic slows down when she smiles! Yo mommas teeth are so yellow, she spits butter! Yo mommas teeth are so yellow, I can't believe its not butter.

50 ways to annoy Edward Cullen? I LOVEE EDWARD and i would never do this to him, but it is pretty hilarious: 50 ways to ANNOY EDWARD CULLEN Jasper and Emmett's list of HOW TO ANNOY EDWARD!!! 1. Prance around the house singing Madonna's 'Like a virgin' at the top of your lungs every morning. 2. Especially loud when Bella is around to hear it. 3. Running it by Charlie that Edward has been 'sleeping' with Bella for the past 2 years, at the wedding reception. 4. Hire a stripper to pop out of the wedding cake XD 5. Buy a sex-ed book and shove it in his locker, making sure that whenever he decides to open it that it falls out, in clear view of the school. 6. Make sure and tell Aro that Edward wants to elope with him. 7. Smear your blood all over his new car freshener. Blame it on Jacob 8.Program his locker to—whenever he opens it to sing (LOUDLY) YOU AND ME BABY WE AIN'T NOTHING BUT MAMMALS, SO LETS DO IT LIKE WE DO ON THE DISCOVERY CHANNEL! HERE WE GO NOW! YOU AND ME BABY WE AIN'T NOTHING BUT MAMMALS SO LETS DO IT LIKE WE DO ON THE DISCOVERY CHANNEL! GET HORNY NOW! And repeat. Over and over and over. 9. Tell him it was Jacob's idea. 10. Show him the twilight trailer. Ask him if he's thinks that he looks like a pedophile or if it's just you. 11. Ask him where babies come from. Tell him he's stupid when he won't answer your question. 12. For his birthday give him a $100 McDonalds gift card, and get offended when he tells you he doesn't eat food. 13. Post his phone number and address on e-harmony. 14. Tell him Bella wants to elope with Paul. 15. Ask him why he likes watching Bella sleep. Call him a pervert. 16. Steal his Vanquish and program his radio to only play Lollipop –unedited of course. Make sure he can't turn it off or get it replaced. 17. Replace his ring tone with 'Outta my head' by Asheele Simpson. Make sure he can't change it. 18. Color on all his Bella pictures with Permanent marker. 19. Refuse to replace them. 20. Ask him to be a gangsta with you for Halloween. 21. Get offended when he refuses. 22. Take him to Victoria's Secret with Alice. 23. Constantly whisper in his ear "Chinese Fireball….ooooooooh!" (HP REFERENCE) 24. Ask him how his bath with Harry was (HP REFERENCE.). 25. Constantly remind him that he almost lost Bella to a dog. 26. Key his car. 'Jacob and Edward = LURVE' 27. Get him on that show 'intervention'. Make sure everyone knows he addicted to heroin. 28. Tell him you have Bella as a witness if he denies it. 29. Picture yourself naked and covered in blood. Ask him if he wants you. 30. Call him a liar when he says no. 31. Throw boysenberry flavoured muffins at him every time he tries to speak. 32. Tell him Bella is pregnant and eloping with Mike Newton. 33. Tell him you were kidding once he murders Mike. 34. Ask him if Charlie is secretly a unicorn. 35. Make him watch the twilight movie. 36. Ask him if he thinks Robert Pattinson is hot. When he says no, tell him he has low self esteem issues. 37. Buy him a dog. Name it Jacob. 38. Train the dog to follow him everywhere. P.S. Make sure he doesn't eat it. 39. Ask him why he's not as hot as Robert Pattinson. 40. Ask him if he's a virgin. 41. When he says yes, take a picture of him and tape it to the 40 year old virgin movie poster. 42. Make him watch Hairspray with you. Ask him why he's not as hot as Zac Efron. 43. When he says that he is, ask him why he wasn't the star of the singing high school people. 44. Tape porn to his walls. 45. Make sure Bella sees it. 46. Nail his CDS to the ceiling along with his Stereo. 47. Refuse to take them down. 48. Tell him Jacob thinks he's a sex god. 49. Tell him Jane thinks he's better than a sex god. 50. Start singing 'Paper cut' around him. Constantly. "There. That should do," Jasper said as he finished writing. He turned to Emmett. "Ready?" "HELL YEAH!" Emmett yelled. Jasper smiled. "Let's do this." Disclaimers: We are not responsible for any, Ripping/shredding/tearing/beating/bruising/bleeding/general destruction of you or your property. We can only guarantee that you will ANNOY THE HECK OUT OF EDWARD.

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Survey: Pick one out of each category? Sports: MLB NHL NBA NFL MLS Drink: Coffee Tea H2O Soda Energy Drink Milk Food: Fast Chinese Mexican Italian Number: 7 13 25 46 80 Music: Classical Oldies Pop Jazz Rap Thing to do on Y!A: Thumbsing up/down Answering Asking Giving best answer Giving stars Thanks y'all for taking my survey! Hope you liked it. To Cheesehead: Aww, thanks! That's sweet.

Beef Stew Seasoning? i was thiking of making beef stew again today (i have some that expires today.) does anyone have any ideas on what i can do with it? i have a limited supply of herbs/vegetables in the house and i dont feel like popping out, this is what i have. red cabbage pointed cabage (chinese) (dunno what its called in english) http://www.superdeboer.nl/privatedata/PicUpload/4524/225/wzimg.jpg unions (red and white) Leek yellow paprika (just 1) fresh garlic fresh ginger dried spices: anise, star anise, oregano, dille, daragon, curry djawa, curry massala, salt, pepper, paprika powder, cayenne pepper, piment, chinese 5 spice, thym, laos, sereh, funegriek (seed and powder), djinten, kaffer, rosemary, lavender and koriander. vinegar, soysauce, fishsauce, stock tablets and oyster sauce (just a little) any ideas? plz only pick from the list ^^ i have bayleaf ^^, lavender = bayleaf.

Has anyone seen Aliens vs Predator Requiem and can explain it to me? Yes but who is the chinese lady at the end that the govt. guy turns over a metal boomerang/star to and says "This isn't for the govt is it, Ms. U ?" (I forgot her name). Not sure where the metal boomerang triangle came from (maybe from one of the Preds arms?)...and what side is Ms. U on? Ok, hard to tell the Predator that is taking medicine to keep the alien from popping out of his belly from the Alien that is morphed into a Predator. And then in the end, instead of popping out of the Predator's belly, he just morphs into a Pred/Alien like the other one and they fight each other (I guess for territory?). I never saw the Predator movies except a little of one with Stallone (I think) . Not sure what they do or why they hung one guy skinned alive in the tree? Or how they shoot Aliens with red triangles that come from lasers in their eyes? I am confused about Alien reproductions stuff. First they used to grab people and wrap them up to feed to their babies that came out of eggs, (cont) then the babies would latch onto someone's face and go down their throat and come out of their belly as an adolescent (?) alien. In this one the large alien sticks its tongue or mouth to another mouth and puts a bunch of alien eggs in there to "hatch" and come out the belly of the person. And if the person is a guy, sometimes they just whack their tongue on his forehead to kill him? And sometimes there is just a big chunk missing from the belly? The aliens got some people in the beginning, but the people didn't morph, they just died. Isn't it supposed to morph into a lookalike person after it pops out? And the Pred with the alien in his belly (and taking shots for it) was just dousing all the bodies with acid to make them disappear...why did he care one way or the other? Someone told me the Chinese lady was from the first Alien movie...I don't remember back that far.. YES! Mrs. Yutan...someone said she was in the first Alien movie... But I think the one with the medicine morphed into a Pred/Alien hybrid in the end like the other one...hard to tell... they all look alike...LOL... Ok, stallone and arnold...they both look alike too...LOL.. Ok, it was the Pred/Alien hybrid that put the Alien babies in the pregnant woman..it was hard to tell the Pred/Alien from the Pred guy. ... and I knew they morphed somehow, just humanoid, but when the man and the boy had aliens hatch..oh, they were just humanoid, not exactly look like the people..

answer as much as you can [i dare you]? When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny? Are eyebrows considered facial hair? If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on? In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"? Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions? Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round? Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary? Can you daydream at night? Why is it that on a phone or calculator the number five has a little dot on it? Can crop circles be square? If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor? Is it legal to travel down a road in reverse, as long as your following the direction of the traffic? When Atheists go to court, do they have to swear on the bible? Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown? Can animals commit suicide? What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant? If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient? How can something be "new" and "improved"? if it's new, what was it improving on? Why aren't drapes double sided so it looks nice on the inside and outside of your home? When two people marry, they say, "you may kiss the bride". What do they say if two MEN get married? Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"? Why do people say beans beans the magical fruit when beans are vegetables? If laughter is the best medicine, who's the idiot who said they 'died laughing'? If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? Why are the little styrofoam pieces called peanuts? Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs. Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts? Why are they called 'Jolly Ranchers'? Who said that the ranchers were jolly? Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing? Can a short person "talk down" to a taller person? If a bald person works as a chef at a restaurant, do they have to wear a hairnet? If milk goes bad if not refrigerated, does it go bad if the cow isnt refrigerated? How fast do hotcakes sell? Do prison buses have emergency exits? Do astronauts change their clocks when they move over different time zones in space? Can a black person join the kkk? When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die? When there's two men who "get married", do they both go to the same bachelor party? If a guy that was about to die in the electric chair had a heart attack should they save him? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? Do Jewish vampires avoid crosses or Stars of David? If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down? Why is it that before 9/11 they always showed the emergency broadcast system test, and on 9/11 they never used it? If a nursing mother had her nipples pierced would the milk come out of all three holes? Who was Sadie Hawkins? If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense? Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull a baby to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle on the ground? If parents say, "Never take candy from strangers" then why do we celebrate Halloween? Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself? Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? What does PU stand for (as in "PU, that stinks!")? Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase? Can cannibals be arrested for being under the influence of alcohol (e.g. drunk-driving) if they have eaten someone who was drunk? What is the stage of a reptile when it has eggs in it but they haven't been laid. Are they pregnant? If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes? Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning? If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them? Why is it called a funny bone, when if you hit it, it's not funny at all? Do you yawn in your sleep? Why do dogs like the smell of other dogs butts? If a cannible was on death row could he ask for the last guy that was electricuted for his last meal? Do Chinese people get English sayings tattooed on their bodies? Do glow-in-the-dark objects stop glowing when somebody turns the lights on? If you died with braces on would they take them off? If someone has their nose pierced, have a cold, and take thier nose ring out. Does snot come out of the piercing hole? How come lemon washing up liquid contains real lemons, but lemon juice contains artificial flavorings. Do you wake up or open your eyes first? Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them? Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11? How do you handcuff a one-armed man? If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it? In some books, why do they have blank pages at the very end? Why can't donuts be square? Why put a towel in the dirty clothes basket if when you get out of the shower you are clean? What happens to an irrisitable force when it hits an immovable object? If there's a speed of sound and a speed of light is there a speed of smell? Why do overalls have bel loops, since they are held up at the top by the straps? Do people in prison celebrate halloween.... if so how? Do the security guards at airports have to go through airport security when they get to work? Why are all of the Harry Potter spells in Latin if they're English? What do Greeks say when they don't understand something? What happens if a queen gives birth to a pair of siamese twins? Who gets to be king? Do all-boys schools have girls bathrooms? Conversely, do all-girls schools have boys bathrooms? Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them? How come cats butts go up when you pet them? What would happen to the sea's water level if every boat in the World was taken out of the water at the same time? How come you never see a billboard being put up by the highway? Do the English people eat English muffins, or are they just called muffins? How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it? Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors? Why does Jello have a smell when you add the powder in the water, but when it "gels" the smell is gone? Why are dogs noses always wet? If a bee is allergic to pollen would it get the hives? Why do people say "heads up" when you should duck? Why is it OK for dudes to slap other dudes' asses in football, but not in any other situation? Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread? If one man says, "it was an uphill battle," and another says, "it went downhill from there," how could they both be having troubles? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? At what point in man's evolution did he start wiping his ass? Do bald people get Dandruff? Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Why do superheros wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes? If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to? When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs? Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Can you cry under water? Why Does Pluto Live in a dog house, eat dog food, etc. but Goofy, who is also a dog, lives in a condo and drives a car? If you blew a bubble in space would it pop? Are children who use sign language allowed to talk with their mouth full? How come all of the planets are spherical? How did the first women ever to shave their legs know that the skin wouldn't just peel right off? when a pregnant lady has twins, is there 1 or 2 umbilical cords? Why doesn't Winnie the Pooh ever get stung by the bees he messes with? Why do they put holes in crackers? Can you still say "Put it where the sun don't shine " on a nude beach? What do people in China call their good plates? How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown? Why don't woodpeckers get headaches when they slam their head on a tree all day? If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth? If an escalotor breaks down, does it become stairs? Why do they call him Donkey Kong if he is not a donkey? Why do they say a football team is the 'world champion' when they don't play anybody outside the US? Do stuttering people stutter when they're thinking to themselves? If you put a chameleon in a room full of mirrors, what color would it turn? What are the handles for corn on the cob called? Why do British people never sound British when they sing? Why do we press the start button to turn off the computer? Do your eyes change color when you die? Were Mary and Joseph's surname Christ before Jesus was born? If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile? Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another? In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section? How old are you before it can be said you died of old age? If K.F.C Stands for Kentucky Fried Chicken, Why do they play sweet home Alabama on the comercials? If people with one arm go to get their nails done, do they pay half price? What type of animal is Snuffaluffagus? If you had a three story house and were in the second floor, isn't it possible that you can be upstairs and downstairs at the same time? Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family? Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore? Does a 'Marks-A-Lot' marker, mark any more than a regular marker? If you really could dig a hole to China, and you did, and you fell in, would you stop in the middle because of gravity? If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off? What happens when you put a lightsaber in water? On Gilligan's Island, how did Ginger have so many different outfits when they were only going on a 3 hour tour? If I had my legs amputated, would I have to change my height and weight on my driver's license? If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it? How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink? Do movie producers still say lights, camera, and action when it is a dark scene? What do you call male ballerinas? How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt? Why people are so scared of mice,which are much smaller than us, when no one seems to be scared of Micky Mouse, who is bigger than us? Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed? Why are plastic bears the only animal you can get honey from? Why can't you get honey from a plastic bee? Can bald men get lice? When your photo is taken for your driver's license, why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by the police and asked for your license, are you going to be smiling? Do butterflies remember life as a caterpillar? If you undergo chemotherapy do you lose your pubic hairs? Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Does the postman deliver his own mail? Why does toilet bowl cleaner only come in the color blue? What happens when you put hand sanitizer on a place other then your hand? Why are women and men's shoe sizes different? Can you "stare off into space" when you're in space? Where do people in Hell tell other people to go? Is "vice-versa" to a dyslexic just plain redundant? How come you can kill a deer and put it up on your wall. but it's illegal to keep one as a pet? Why do we say we're head over heels when we're happy? Isn't that the way we normally are? If prunes are dehydrated plums, where does prune juice come from? Is it appropriate to say "good mourning" at a funeral? If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule? When you're caught "between a rock and a hard place", is the rock not hard? Was Jesus a virgin when he died? Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? Doesn't a lightning rod on top of church show a lack of faith? Who coined the phrase, 'coined the phrase?' If there were a thousand seaguls in an airplane while its flying, each weighing two pounds a piece, but they were all flying in the airplane, would the airplane weigh 2000 pounds more? If you soak a raisin in water, does it turn back into a grape? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do they call steam rollers, steam rollers? They don't produce, get rid of, or have anythong to do with steam What is another word for "thesaurus"?

Some Funny && Crazy Thoughts? When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny? Are eyebrows considered facial hair? If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on? In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"? Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions? Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round? Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary? Can you daydream at night? Why is it that on a phone or calculator the number five has a little dot on it? Can crop circles be square? If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor? Is it legal to travel down a road in reverse, as long as your following the direction of the traffic? When Atheists go to court, do they have to swear on the bible? Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown? Can animals commit suicide? What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant? If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient? How can something be "new" and "improved"? if it's new, what was it improving on? Why aren't drapes double sided so it looks nice on the inside and outside of your home? When two people marry, they say, "you may kiss the bride". What do they say if two MEN get married? Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"? Why do people say beans beans the magical fruit when beans are vegetables? If laughter is the best medicine, who's the idiot who said they 'died laughing'? If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? Why are the little styrofoam pieces called peanuts? Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs. Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts? Why are they called 'Jolly Ranchers'? Who said that the ranchers were jolly? Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing? Can a short person "talk down" to a taller person? If a bald person works as a chef at a restaurant, do they have to wear a hairnet? If milk goes bad if not refrigerated, does it go bad if the cow isnt refrigerated? How fast do hotcakes sell? Do prison buses have emergency exits? Do astronauts change their clocks when they move over different time zones in space? Can a black person join the kkk? When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die? When there's two men who "get married", do they both go to the same bachelor party? If a guy that was about to die in the electric chair had a heart attack should they save him? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? Do Jewish vampires avoid crosses or Stars of David? If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down? Why is it that before 9/11 they always showed the emergency broadcast system test, and on 9/11 they never used it? If a nursing mother had her nipples pierced would the milk come out of all three holes? Who was Sadie Hawkins? If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense? Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull a baby to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle on the ground? If parents say, "Never take candy from strangers" then why do we celebrate Halloween? Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself? Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? What does PU stand for (as in "PU, that stinks!")? Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase? Can cannibals be arrested for being under the influence of alcohol (e.g. drunk-driving) if they have eaten someone who was drunk? What is the stage of a reptile when it has eggs in it but they haven't been laid. Are they pregnant? If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes? Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning? If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them? Why is it called a funny bone, when if you hit it, it's not funny at all? Do you yawn in your sleep? Why do dogs like the smell of other dogs butts? If a cannible was on death row could he ask for the last guy that was electricuted for his last meal? Do Chinese people get English sayings tattooed on their bodies? Do glow-in-the-dark objects stop glowing when somebody turns the lights on? If you died with braces on would they take them off? If someone has their nose pierced, have a cold, and take thier nose ring out. Does snot come out of the piercing hole? How come lemon washing up liquid contains real lemons, but lemon juice contains artificial flavorings. Do you wake up or open your eyes first? Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them? Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11? How do you handcuff a one-armed man? If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it? In some books, why do they have blank pages at the very end? Why can't donuts be square? Why put a towel in the dirty clothes basket if when you get out of the shower you are clean? What happens to an irrisitable force when it hits an immovable object? If there's a speed of sound and a speed of light is there a speed of smell? Why do overalls have bel loops, since they are held up at the top by the straps? Do people in prison celebrate halloween.... if so how? Do the security guards at airports have to go through airport security when they get to work? Why are all of the Harry Potter spells in Latin if they're English? What do Greeks say when they don't understand something? What happens if a queen gives birth to a pair of siamese twins? Who gets to be king? Do all-boys schools have girls bathrooms? Conversely, do all-girls schools have boys bathrooms? Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them? How come cats butts go up when you pet them? What would happen to the sea's water level if every boat in the World was taken out of the water at the same time? How come you never see a billboard being put up by the highway? Do the English people eat English muffins, or are they just called muffins? How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it? Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors? Why does Jello have a smell when you add the powder in the water, but when it "gels" the smell is gone? Why are dogs noses always wet? If a bee is allergic to pollen would it get the hives? Why do people say "heads up" when you should duck? Why is it OK for dudes to slap other dudes' asses in football, but not in any other situation? Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread? If one man says, "it was an uphill battle," and another says, "it went downhill from there," how could they both be having troubles? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? At what point in man's evolution did he start wiping his ***? Do bald people get Dandruff? Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Why do superheros wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes? If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to? When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs? Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Can you cry under water? Why Does Pluto Live in a dog house, eat dog food, etc. but Goofy, who is also a dog, lives in a condo and drives a car? If you blew a bubble in space would it pop? Are children who use sign language allowed to talk with their mouth full? How come all of the planets are spherical? How did the first women ever to shave their legs know that the skin wouldn't just peel right off? when a pregnant lady has twins, is there 1 or 2 umbilical cords? Why doesn't Winnie the Pooh ever get stung by the bees he messes with? Why do they put holes in crackers? Can you still say "Put it where the sun don't shine " on a nude beach? What do people in China call their good plates? How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown? Why don't woodpeckers get headaches when they slam their head on a tree all day? If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth? If an escalotor breaks down, does it become stairs? Why do they call him Donkey Kong if he is not a donkey? Why do they say a football team is the 'world champion' when they don't play anybody outside the US? Do stuttering people stutter when they're thinking to themselves? If you put a chameleon in a room full of mirrors, what color would it turn? What are the handles for corn on the cob called? Why do British people never sound British when they sing? Why do we press the start button to turn off the computer? Do your eyes change color when you die? Were Mary and Joseph's surname Christ before Jesus was born? If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile? Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another? In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section? How old are you before it can be said you died of old age? If K.F.C Stands for Kentucky Fried Chicken, Why do they play sweet home Alabama on the comercials? If people with one arm go to get their nails done, do they pay half price? What type of animal is Snuffaluffagus? If you had a three story house and were in the second floor, isn't it possible that you can be upstairs and downstairs at the same time? Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family? Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore? Does a 'Marks-A-Lot' marker, mark any more than a regular marker? If you really could dig a hole to China, and you did, and you fell in, would you stop in the middle because of gravity? If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off? What happens when you put a lightsaber in water? On Gilligan's Island, how did Ginger have so many different outfits when they were only going on a 3 hour tour? If I had my legs amputated, would I have to change my height and weight on my driver's license? If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it? How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink? Do movie producers still say lights, camera, and action when it is a dark scene? What do you call male ballerinas? How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt? Why people are so scared of mice,which are much smaller than us, when no one seems to be scared of Micky Mouse, who is bigger than us? Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed? Why are plastic bears the only animal you can get honey from? Why can't you get honey from a plastic bee? Can bald men get lice? When your photo is taken for your driver's license, why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by the police and asked for your license, are you going to be smiling? Do butterflies remember life as a caterpillar? If you undergo chemotherapy do you lose your pubic hairs? Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Does the postman deliver his own mail? Why does toilet bowl cleaner only come in the color blue? What happens when you put hand sanitizer on a place other then your hand? Why are women and men's shoe sizes different? Can you "stare off into space" when you're in space? Where do people in Hell tell other people to go? Is "vice-versa" to a dyslexic just plain redundant? How come you can kill a deer and put it up on your wall. but it's illegal to keep one as a pet? Why do we say we're head over heels when we're happy? Isn't that the way we normally are? If prunes are dehydrated plums, where does prune juice come from? Is it appropriate to say "good mourning" at a funeral? If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule? When you're caught "between a rock and a hard place", is the rock not hard? Was Jesus a virgin when he died? Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? Doesn't a lightning rod on top of church show a lack of faith? Who coined the phrase, 'coined the phrase?' If there were a thousand seaguls in an airplane while its flying, each weighing two pounds a piece, but they were all flying in the airplane, would the airplane weigh 2000 pounds more? If you soak a raisin in water, does it turn back into a grape? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do they call steam rollers, steam rollers? They don't produce, get rid of, or have anythong to do with steam What is another word for "thesaurus"?

Some Questions ;P ? When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny? Are eyebrows considered facial hair? If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on? In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"? Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions? Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round? Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary? Can you daydream at night? Why is it that on a phone or calculator the number five has a little dot on it? Can crop circles be square? If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor? Is it legal to travel down a road in reverse, as long as your following the direction of the traffic? When Atheists go to court, do they have to swear on the bible? Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown? Can animals commit suicide? What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant? If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient? How can something be "new" and "improved"? if it's new, what was it improving on? Why aren't drapes double sided so it looks nice on the inside and outside of your home? When two people marry, they say, "you may kiss the bride". What do they say if two MEN get married? Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"? Why do people say beans beans the magical fruit when beans are vegetables? If laughter is the best medicine, who's the idiot who said they 'died laughing'? If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches? Why are the little styrofoam pieces called peanuts? Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs. Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts? Why are they called 'Jolly Ranchers'? Who said that the ranchers were jolly? Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing? Can a short person "talk down" to a taller person? If a bald person works as a chef at a restaurant, do they have to wear a hairnet? If milk goes bad if not refrigerated, does it go bad if the cow isnt refrigerated? How fast do hotcakes sell? Do prison buses have emergency exits? Do astronauts change their clocks when they move over different time zones in space? Can a black person join the kkk? When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die? When there's two men who "get married", do they both go to the same bachelor party? If a guy that was about to die in the electric chair had a heart attack should they save him? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? Do Jewish vampires avoid crosses or Stars of David? If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down? Why is it that before 9/11 they always showed the emergency broadcast system test, and on 9/11 they never used it? If a nursing mother had her nipples pierced would the milk come out of all three holes? Who was Sadie Hawkins? If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense? Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull a baby to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle on the ground? If parents say, "Never take candy from strangers" then why do we celebrate Halloween? Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself? Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? What does PU stand for (as in "PU, that stinks!")? Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase? Can cannibals be arrested for being under the influence of alcohol (e.g. drunk-driving) if they have eaten someone who was drunk? What is the stage of a reptile when it has eggs in it but they haven't been laid. Are they pregnant? If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes? Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning? If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them? Why is it called a funny bone, when if you hit it, it's not funny at all? Do you yawn in your sleep? Why do dogs like the smell of other dogs butts? If a cannible was on death row could he ask for the last guy that was electricuted for his last meal? Do Chinese people get English sayings tattooed on their bodies? Do glow-in-the-dark objects stop glowing when somebody turns the lights on? If you died with braces on would they take them off? If someone has their nose pierced, have a cold, and take thier nose ring out. Does snot come out of the piercing hole? How come lemon washing up liquid contains real lemons, but lemon juice contains artificial flavorings. Do you wake up or open your eyes first? Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them? Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11? How do you handcuff a one-armed man? If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it? In some books, why do they have blank pages at the very end? Why can't donuts be square? Why put a towel in the dirty clothes basket if when you get out of the shower you are clean? What happens to an irrisitable force when it hits an immovable object? If there's a speed of sound and a speed of light is there a speed of smell? Why do overalls have bel loops, since they are held up at the top by the straps? Do people in prison celebrate halloween.... if so how? Do the security guards at airports have to go through airport security when they get to work? Why are all of the Harry Potter spells in Latin if they're English? What do Greeks say when they don't understand something? What happens if a queen gives birth to a pair of siamese twins? Who gets to be king? Do all-boys schools have girls bathrooms? Conversely, do all-girls schools have boys bathrooms? Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them? How come cats butts go up when you pet them? What would happen to the sea's water level if every boat in the World was taken out of the water at the same time? How come you never see a billboard being put up by the highway? Do the English people eat English muffins, or are they just called muffins? How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it? Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors? Why does Jello have a smell when you add the powder in the water, but when it "gels" the smell is gone? Why are dogs noses always wet? If a bee is allergic to pollen would it get the hives? Why do people say "heads up" when you should duck? Why is it OK for dudes to slap other dudes' asses in football, but not in any other situation? Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread? If one man says, "it was an uphill battle," and another says, "it went downhill from there," how could they both be having troubles? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? At what point in man's evolution did he start wiping his ass? Do bald people get Dandruff? Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? Why do superheros wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes? If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to? When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs? Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Can you cry under water? Why Does Pluto Live in a dog house, eat dog food, etc. but Goofy, who is also a dog, lives in a condo and drives a car? If you blew a bubble in space would it pop? Are children who use sign language allowed to talk with their mouth full? How come all of the planets are spherical? How did the first women ever to shave their legs know that the skin wouldn't just peel right off? when a pregnant lady has twins, is there 1 or 2 umbilical cords? Why doesn't Winnie the Pooh ever get stung by the bees he messes with? Why do they put holes in crackers? Can you still say "Put it where the sun don't shine " on a nude beach? What do people in China call their good plates? How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown? Why don't woodpeckers get headaches when they slam their head on a tree all day? If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth? If an escalotor breaks down, does it become stairs? Why do they call him Donkey Kong if he is not a donkey? Why do they say a football team is the 'world champion' when they don't play anybody outside the US? Do stuttering people stutter when they're thinking to themselves? If you put a chameleon in a room full of mirrors, what color would it turn? What are the handles for corn on the cob called? Why do British people never sound British when they sing? Why do we press the start button to turn off the computer? Do your eyes change color when you die? Were Mary and Joseph's surname Christ before Jesus was born? If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile? Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another? In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section? How old are you before it can be said you died of old age? If K.F.C Stands for Kentucky Fried Chicken, Why do they play sweet home Alabama on the comercials? If people with one arm go to get their nails done, do they pay half price? What type of animal is Snuffaluffagus? If you had a three story house and were in the second floor, isn't it possible that you can be upstairs and downstairs at the same time? Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family? Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore? Does a 'Marks-A-Lot' marker, mark any more than a regular marker? If you really could dig a hole to China, and you did, and you fell in, would you stop in the middle because of gravity? If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off? What happens when you put a lightsaber in water? On Gilligan's Island, how did Ginger have so many different outfits when they were only going on a 3 hour tour? If I had my legs amputated, would I have to change my height and weight on my driver's license? If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it? How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink? Do movie producers still say lights, camera, and action when it is a dark scene? What do you call male ballerinas? How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt? Why people are so scared of mice,which are much smaller than us, when no one seems to be scared of Micky Mouse, who is bigger than us? Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed? Why are plastic bears the only animal you can get honey from? Why can't you get honey from a plastic bee? Can bald men get lice? When your photo is taken for your driver's license, why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by the police and asked for your license, are you going to be smiling? Do butterflies remember life as a caterpillar? If you undergo chemotherapy do you lose your pubic hairs? Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Does the postman deliver his own mail? Why does toilet bowl cleaner only come in the color blue? What happens when you put hand sanitizer on a place other then your hand? Why are women and men's shoe sizes different? Can you "stare off into space" when you're in space? Where do people in Hell tell other people to go? Is "vice-versa" to a dyslexic just plain redundant? How come you can kill a deer and put it up on your wall. but it's illegal to keep one as a pet? Why do we say we're head over heels when we're happy? Isn't that the way we normally are? If prunes are dehydrated plums, where does prune juice come from? Is it appropriate to say "good mourning" at a funeral? If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule? When you're caught "between a rock and a hard place", is the rock not hard? Was Jesus a virgin when he died? Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? Doesn't a lightning rod on top of church show a lack of faith? Who coined the phrase, 'coined the phrase?' If there were a thousand seaguls in an airplane while its flying, each weighing two pounds a piece, but they were all flying in the airplane, would the airplane weigh 2000 pounds more? If you soak a raisin in water, does it turn back into a grape? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do they call steam rollers, steam rollers? They don't produce, get rid of, or have anythong to do with steam What is another word for "thesaurus"?

Yay or Nay...? Pls star if you like this one. Thx. A woman is in the delivery room giving birth, the doctor tells her to push. She does and the baby's head pops out. The doctor says, "Oh! Your baby has slanted eyes." To which she replies "Yeah I heard them Chinese men were pretty good, so I decided to give them a try.� The doctor shrugs it off and tells her to push again. This time the baby's body comes out. "Holy ****, your baby has a white body," the doctor says. "Yeah I heard them white men were pretty good so I decided to give them a try," she said. The doctor shrugs it off again and tells her to push again and that will be it. So she does and the legs come out. "Holy ****! Your baby has black legs," the doctor said. "Yeah I heard them black men were pretty good so I decided to give them a try," she said. So the doctor shrugs it off again and ties the umbilical cord and slaps the baby on the ***, it starts to cry. The doctor turns to the woman and asks, "How are you going to deal with a baby who has slanted eyes, white body, and black legs?" The woman replies "I'm just glad it didn't bark!"